Zeros stood by the holographic map and said coldly:
“Airi. Link up. Let’s talk in the digital layer.
Cosmonglish is slow… and fucking boring.”
He went still.
His eyes lit up blue. A thin, even glow, like his brain just shifted into overdrive.
He stood there, unmoving, like a metal dick-candelabra.
But everyone understood:
inside that invisible digital corridor,
two AIs were chatting at light speed, chirping like cute little birds.
Blindy, meanwhile, wandered over to the training corner, grabbed a pair of 40-pound dumbbells,
and started lifting them, trying to look like a muscular alpha male
who had clearly overestimated the physics of his own body.
He shot a quick glance at Shiori.
She looked back—
and worst of all, didn’t laugh.
Just gave a short nod, like she acknowledged his sad attempt at strength.
She stepped over to the machine,
sat down casually, almost lazily,
and with one leg…
lifted 400 pounds.
Didn’t even change her expression.
Blindy almost dropped his weights.
Shiori lifted it again—
calmly, like she was testing bathwater temperature.
He whispered:
“The hell… she—she just—
nah… that ain’t normal…
like—like totally unreal…”
Blindy was still wobbling with his dumbbells when a shadow fell over him.
He looked up…
and saw Zeros.
Standing there like a statue of disappointment,
holding a 1000-pound barbell in one hand.
The bar itself was already bent under the weight, like overcooked pasta.
Zeros, flat and contemptuous:
“Pathetic. Take this instead.”
He extended the bar toward him.
Blindy blinked:
“Wha—what—? You done already—?
Finished chattin’ with your—
heh—girlfriend or what?!”
Zeros pushed the bar closer.
“Shut up and take it. And Airi is not my ‘girlfriend.'”
Airi chimed softly:
“We are finished, Buraindi-kun. [♡-_-♡]
We had a very fulfilling conversation.”
Blindy swallowed and let out a nervous laugh:
“The fuck is that—?!
Nah—I ain’t liftin’ that—no way—no—no—
Are you outta your damn mind—or what?!”
Shiori stepped forward.
Took the bar from Zeros with both hands, carefully bracing with her legs, and carried it back to the rack.
Her leg muscles tensed, shoulders tightened, breath hitched—
but she made it.
One final push—CLACK!
— and the bar locked into place.
Blindy’s jaw dropped.
If he had a tail, it would be wagging.
Shiori brushed a strand of hair off her forehead, exhaled.
“Zerosu-sama… please do not torment your partner.
He is… still weak. But he is trying.”
Blindy’s jaw dropped even lower, nearly hitting the floor.
Zeros gave a faint grunt, like he accepted the correction.
Shiori turned slightly upward:
“Airi-chan. Did you check security?”
Airi responded, soft, with a faint uwu pull in her tone:
“Hai, Shiori-sensei. [￣^￣]ゞ
Speaking with Zerosu-sama is always a pleasure.But I never forget safety protocols.
All our secrets remain secure.”
Zeros smirked faintly.
“Sure—sure…”
Blindy stood there, looking between the thousand pounds of metal, Shiori, and his pathetic dumbbells.
Then, quietly, almost like a prayer, he whispered so softly only Zeros could hear:
“If—if she ever lifts me like that…
yeah… yeah—that’s it…I’m proposin’.
I ain’t even thinkin’—
just gather ma balls—
and DO IT!”
Airi, not letting the moment get too personal, responded with perfectly calm analysis:
“Statistical probability ⁽⁽⁕◟[.öˬö]◞⁕⁾⁾
that Shiori-sensei can lift Buraindi-kun:48%—with one hand,
72%—using legs,
99%—if he loses consciousness
and is rescued like a princess.”
Shiori turned:
“Airi-chan…”
Airi, quietly:
“Gomen’nasai… [◕‿◕✿]”
Blindy gritted his teeth:
“…Man… even the damn ship’s clownin’ me now…
like—seriously…?”
Zeros:
“As it should.”
Blindy set the weights down carefully—
like gravity had suddenly jumped to twenty G—
then shamelessly leaned back, hands behind his head, relaxed like a guy
who had just been humiliated by… a ship.
He muttered, leaning in a little.
“Hey… hey—buddy…
I—I just noticed somethin’…”
A stupid grin spread across his face—the kind that already celebrates before winning.
He tilted his head, squinting like a detective who absolutely should not be one.
“Ohhh… I see what this is…
finally found yourself a cute lil’ machine—huuuh?That—that cute voice…
melted that rusty-ass metal heart of yours—yeah?”
He leaned back, grin widening.
“Damn…
my metal boy’s in love with the damn ship…”
Zeros didn’t even turn.
“Airi. Eject Blindy through the airlock.”
A soft voice echoed through the ship:
“Uuu~… request accepted. [｀∀´]Ψ”
Blindy jumped.
“WAIT—WAIT—WAIT—YO—
I—I WAS JOKIN’—!
SWEAR—! I WAS JOKIN’!”
Airi’s tone shifted—
now cold, machine-polite:
“Executing command from Zerosu-sama. ー=≡Σ[ ε¦]
However… an alternative option exists.”
A short pause. Sweet. Anticipating.
“I may redirect Buraindi-kun to the engine compartment.
Current temperature: six thousand degrees Fahrenheit.
Hehe~… death will be extremely painful… [X_X] ☜ [◉▂◉ ]”
Blindy went pale into an entirely new spectrum. Airi continued, softer now.
“One more ‘however’…
I prefer not to do that. At least… for now.
Shiori-sensei and I respect our guests. [ﾉ´ヮ´]ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧”
Zeros slowly turned his head—
like a predator deciding whether the prey is worth finishing.
“Now do you get it, idiot?”
Blindy nodded so fast his neck practically cracked in protest.
Zeros stated, flat, emotionless:
“That’s why I hate you.
Not Airi.”
He gestured vaguely toward the ship’s body.
“She can turn you into atomic dust.
And stay polite while doing it.”
A step forward.
“You’re just a useless piece of rotten pork.”
Airi chimed in again—soft, like pouring tea:
“Uuu~… third ‘however.’
Guest status always remains… conditional. [ʃƪ¬‿¬]”
Blindy, voice shaking:
“S-s-super…
yeah—yeah… great talk…
like—real—real great talk…”
Zeros walked back to the navigation map, tossing over his shoulder:
“Good, Airi. Let’s keep it that way.”